no one bothers... no one truly cares about you. this world you must fight to survive and live in. camp life is fucking fucked up when you have to put up with selfish sarcastic fucks. i don't know what is their problem man. i blame myself. i wish i was a commander. power is everything. i can hold them under my thumb and they cant do shit to me. so sick of being so lousy and pathetic. a few more months and this will all be nothing but a nightmare. I have learned that power is everything in this world. power > everything Back home, I have to deal with a useless father and an angry mother. fuck my life. i don't even feel im part of the house sometimes. Its better that i buck up and get my own place someday. This isn't my home. Its just borrowed space. And the girlfriend says I am just complaining too much. Is it too much to have a listening ear, when the pressure just keeps mounting up. I am going to break out someday. Fuck all of this bullshit

让我爱她

Time flies - so much has happened since my last post. so much time put to good use and so much time wasted away. This ticking clock which contains time reminds us that nothing lasts forever... that change is constant.I What have I achieved all these while when im away? - Graduated poly (With grades either here nor there, chances of entering uni is still a question mark) - Army (I didn't manage to prove myself and am now a man. Sorely disappointed with myself. I must learn to be less calculative and selfish, and learn to work with people better.) - Relationship (Went thru numerous breaking up and patching back. Im tired...) - Family (NS taught and made me realize how much my family and home means to me, for this I will be eternally grateful although camp life is a bitch) What I hope to achieve in 2013: 1) Treasure my family and friends more. [show my parents I love them, rekindle old friendships and forge new bonds) 2) University (I hope to enter a local uni and do well this time. I improved from poly compared to sec, but I wish to do better) 3) Relationship (Jh, I love you. But now I am on the verge of giving up. I don't know how this is going to play out, but if i have to let go of you... save me from myself) I am a loser now... not forever.

A NAMELESS FEELING

walking down the aisle of the night
where moonbeam shines and the bird takes flight
with your hand in mine
are things alright?

a dare i made to question the fate
of my actions they gladly face
am i here or far away
my heart just takes two steps back.

your smile that i would like to know
that i am the one who made it glow

playground affairs for tiny men
brings us back to simpler days
where love was bright and we steered our ship
against the pirates and wind of seas

this love we both know i would always keep
in the pocket
in the heart
would you do the same if i hadn't told you so?

hold on hold on.

its not too hard to find a hand to walk with, but hold on to that hand...

dont let it go so easily.

we can conquer our fears.

there is this girl and her name starts with J.

=)=)=)

GUESS WHAT I'VE FOUND

crazy elephant, clarke quay, 21st july 09

i have finally fulfilled dream of wanting to play on stage =)